Life tastes good Lipsmackin’, thirstquenchin’, acetastin’, motivatin’, goodbuzzin’, cooltalkin’, highwalkin’, fastlivin’, evergivin’, coolfizzin’ Impossible is nothing Think different Reach out and touch your flexible friend The ultimate “I’m lovin it” And all because the lady loves I’d walk a mile for Probably the best lager in the world Please don’t squeeze the chairman The antidote…

I used the terms ‘shit-biscuit’ and ‘fuck a duck’ a lot in my formative year. In the same but opposite way as I tend to say that everything is ‘awesome’ now*. In my short stint in teaching, I worked these expletives down to single innocuous expressions. Regularly you’d hear me shout ‘duck’ as a child…

I never knew that marriage would be so lonely. When I calculated how many years there would be, I never included division in my sums. Logic has so little to do with the equation. In the early days, I was always squaring triangles. The contrivance of any relationship – what the world reads; what you…