Evol

Everyone was talking about it. Or at least the advertisement said that everyone was talking about it. The greatest Evolution since… Evolution! Admittedly, Kate’s friends, family and casual acquaintances didn’t know what it did exactly but they had all heard from a friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend that it was the ‘only thing’. Kate rolled her eyes at the…

Idea?

In 1486 a giraffe was released into Florence. It roamed freely for three weeks before dying.

Train Story 3: tuna

Tuna was the dominant smell. The whole carriage was high with the stench. People were screaming, laughing, screwing, fighting. I had thought many thing about the end of the world; I had expected human degradation and desperation; but never the smell of tuna. Overwrought I struggled out of my seat and down the seething aisle….

Story on a train 3: Moving On

Singing “we are the champions” at the top of her voice, Clara tottered down the platform as high as her heels and only half as sensible. It had been a night of good byes. One person lost to cancer by lunch time. One boyfriend, now ex-boyfriend, said good bye over a blazing row and a…

Story on a train 2: Rings

Oh-my-God-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god. Breathe, you stupid woman. Breathe. Oh-my-God-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god. What the Hell am I going to do? I can feel the ring on my finger burning my skin. Making the sheathed patch of skin itch and scratch and writhe away from the metal. Or am I projecting too much? I really need to get a grip. I…

Story on a train 1: Lamia

The man opposite was largely indifferent to her ample charms. This was rather annoying, as she was pretty sure she was more interesting than the suduku in the blasted paper. She licked her lips, pouting out the window at the grey sky and Battersea Dog’s Home as it flew past. That stench. It followed her….

Just Desserts

You’re fat, he said. What? she said. Fat, he said. So? she said. He hesitated. I don’t love you any more, he said. You are not just fat; you were fat when I married you. You are now grotesque. She looked at him. What should she do? Cry? Beg? Rail at the unfairness of it…

Wedding Cake

Recipe 1) Place two people in a party or slightly warmed small room. Leave to infuse. Mix in mutual acquaintances and generous amounts if alcohol. Simmer. Exchange telephone numbers and transfer to taxi. Leave to stand for 3 – 5 days.   2) Now combine the jitters with even more drink. Mixture may look like separating…