Tuna was the dominant smell. The whole carriage was high with the stench. People were screaming, laughing, screwing, fighting. I had thought many thing about the end of the world; I had expected human degradation and desperation; but never the smell of tuna. Overwrought I struggled out of my seat and down the seething aisle….
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Story on a train 3: Moving On
Singing “we are the champions” at the top of her voice, Clara tottered down the platform as high as her heels and only half as sensible. It had been a night of good byes. One person lost to cancer by lunch time. One boyfriend, now ex-boyfriend, said good bye over a blazing row and a…
Story on a train 1: Lamia
The man opposite was largely indifferent to her ample charms. This was rather annoying, as she was pretty sure she was more interesting than the suduku in the blasted paper. She licked her lips, pouting out the window at the grey sky and Battersea Dog’s Home as it flew past. That stench. It followed her….
The pitch I would have done for @Raindance if I could see or speak or stand up…
Hi. My name is Sarah Mann and I make my living building those annoying adverts that pop up over your email when you are trying to read it. Before I get on with my pitch, I’d like to run some personal ads by you. These are apparently the funniest personal ads EVER (according to a…
Random bit of writing I found… No idea what it is or why it is..
A bank of television screens, all showing separate images from CCTV cameras. Sitting in front of these is Jai, eating a bowl of cornflakes. In the centre screen there is a middle aged woman shouting. She can not be heard. She is a mess. She carries lots of crammed plastic bags. Jai zooms in on…
Opening from ‘Poster Boys’, for Westminster Prize 2010*
*It’s not great which is probably why I didn’t even place 🙂 Also, apologies for swearing.. Scene A central London Underground Station (Tottenham Court Road), Night; long after the last train has left the station Lights up. Mark is sitting on the rail. Dennis is standing, pasting the stripped-back board in preparation for a…
Really old comedy sketch (written circa 2006)
A grotty post-office in one ot the mankier London ‘burbs, probably part of a Spa or some such hideous chain. There is a woman behind the post-office counter. She is just finishing with her last customer. She shuffles on and the next customer comes to the counter. He is a young man in his late…
Scene writter for the Zombie Project that will never be used… Boo.
SCENE ONE DARKNESS. BLUE LIGHT UP ON JUST ON BLACK MAMBA’S (RICKY’S) FACE, AS IF HE IS LIT BY A SCREEN. HE IS WEARING GREEN SHADES AND AN EAR PIECE. HE APPEARS TO BE HOLDING A GUN TO HIS FACE. AS EACH CHARACTER JOINS THE CONVERSATION THEIR FACES ARE SIMILARLY LIT. UNDER ALL THIS IS…
Beginning of something…
When he walked into the flat he was surprised to see a strange girl with an odd blonde hair cut, naked on his sofa. He stepped back and examined a door. It had been locked. He was perfectly sure of that. And none of the windows could open wide enough to allow a person to…
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